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EMPATHY ARTS MANUSCRIPT FEEDBACK SERVICES


Empathy Arts is committed to finely crafted, empathetic storytelling that is engaging, creative, and positive.

We offer tiered support, designed for all budgets, levels of experience, and stages of project development.


Script/Manuscript Development:

We can provide detailed feedback on your draft novel, non-fiction book, screenplay or documentary script. We can identify strong and weak points and give guidance for the elevation of your next draft.

If you are a novice writer, or alternatively have a project that has already gone through extensive development, we recommend the Speed Overview Review service below.


Speed Overview Review:

Some writers want fast and more generalised feedback, usually before taking a new direction in a project. Or this service can be used for writers looking for a ‘final checks’ opinion on a very developed Final Draft.

We would also recommend this service for novice writers who have completed their first manuscript or script, to get a generalised overview on their strengths and weaknesses, and the development steps to take next.

Using the 30/10 production house model, and analysing either the first 30 and last 10 pages of your screenplay/documentary film script, or the first 15,000 words and the last 5,000 of your book, we offer:

A comprehensive 3 to 4-page report covering the overall impression, theme, direction, writing style, structure, and pacing.

For scripts and novels, the report will include commentary on characterisation, dialogue, setting, and tone.

For non-fiction, it will focus on reader engagement, the idea translation, and any technical comprehension/accessibility issues.

We will also provide an assessment of your work’s marketability and our most realistic evaluation of its potential.


Future Services – TBA. Please contact us via email if you are interested. fay@empathyarts.com

Concept to Page: we can help you with structure, thematic coherence, character development and storyline arcs, so that you have a page-by-page plan to begin your project.

Final Screenplay Draft: We can see your project through a Producer’s eyes before you show it to a Producer, helping you to maximise appeal, and identifying anything in the project that may prove problematic.

Experienced Writer’s Draft (Manuscripts):
Many published writers are keeping to a tight schedule. We offer a bespoke service, providing page-by-page feedback, with exactly the kind of forensic detail that you would apply yourself if you weren’t so busy, and a supportive outside eye to any “project-blindess” issues which every writer experiences.


AT A GLANCE



Speed Overview Review – New Project

Speed Overview Review – Final Draft 

Script Development


Manuscript Development


For whom?

Writers starting out on a New Project, or a novice writer’s first project


Writers who have already gone through a development process and are looking for an extra opinion on their Final Draft..

Writers who have completed a number of drafts and are looking for next level elevation

Writers who have completed a number of drafts and are looking for next level elevation

What we read

30/10 read-through*

30/10 read-through*

Feature Length Script (90-130 pages) 

Full manuscript

What you will receive (feature & documentaryscripts, novels, fiction and non-fiction manuscripts)

Comprehensive Report 

(3 to 4 pages) 


List of suggestions to take your work to the next level.


Comentary on:

Overall impression

Theme 

Direction

Writing style

Structure 

Pacing of work



Comprehensive Report 

(3 to 4 pages) 


List of suggestions to take your work to the next level.


Assessment of the marketability of your work.


Evaluation of potential for acceptance by industry.



Comentary on:

Overall impression

Theme 

Direction

Writing style

Structure 

Pacing of work

Detailed Report 

(10 to 15 pages) 


Point-by-point notes


Assessment whether the script meets the industry technical standards.


Comprehensive list of levelling up instructions.


Links and/or attached support documents.


1 hour Zoom meeting


Comentary on:

Overall impression

Theme

Direction 

Writing style

Structure

Pacing of work

Plot coherence

Characterisation

Character motivation

Emotional transitions

Relationship arcs 

Dialogue

World-building

Setting

Tone

Detailed report 

(8 to 15 pages) 


Point-by-point notes


Comprehensive action list of instructions to take your work to a professional level.


Links and/or attached support documents.


1 hour Zoom meeting


Commentary on:

Overall impression

Theme

Direction 

Writing style

Structure

Pacing of work

Reader engagement


Plus additional commentary for fiction (drama scripts, novels):

Characterisation

Dialogue

World-building

Setting 

Tone 

Characterisation

Dialogue

World-building

Setting 

Tone 

Plot coherence

Characterisation

Character motivation

Emotional transitions

Relationship arcs 

Dialogue

World-building

Setting

Tone

Narrative viewpoint


Plus additional commentary for 

non-fiction (i.e. textbooks, documentaries):


Reader engagement

Idea translation

Technical comprehension/ accessibility

Reader engagement

Idea translation

Technical comprehension/ accessibility


Keeping the interest

Reader engagement

Idea translation

Coherence

Technical comprehension/accessibility

Points or arguments that may need strengthening

Reader comprehension

Reader engagement 

Pricing (excl. VAT)

CHF 399

CHF 399

CHF 2499

Price based on word count:

Up to 20,000 words  CHF 1299

20,001-40,000 words  CHF 2098

40,001-60,000 words  CHF 3688

+5,000 word increments + CHF 199




* This is the first 30 pages and the last 10 pages, and for book manuscripts this is the first 15,000 words and the last 5,000.
** Pricing based on 20’000 words. Price increments apply, see table below.



SUBMISSION GUIDELINE FOR OUR FEEDBACK SERVICES

NOTE: We do not accept materials that include bigotry and gratuitous violence.


ABOUT OUR SENIOR CONSULTANT – FAY GARRETT

I am deeply passionate about storytelling. I see potential stories in everyday conversations, imagining them as books or scripts. My expertise extends to story structure and format, constantly absorbing diverse and traditional storytelling methods. At Empathy Arts, we are pioneering a holistic approach to the hero’s journey, ensuring every narrative framework we develop serves as a robust scaffold for your story, much like a tent frame supports everything built upon it. This principle applies equally to non-linear narratives and non-fiction, where structure is crucial for maintaining pace and engaging the reader.

My lifelong interest in psychology has enriched my understanding of character development, motivation, and interaction, which are vital for creating believable relationships and engaging dialogues in stories. One crucial aspect of storytelling is ensuring your vision translates effectively to your audience. It is a common pitfall for writers to assume their intent is clear to readers when often, it is not. Our collaborative efforts at Empathy Arts aim to bridge this gap, enhancing your connection with your audience.

With over 20 years of experience across various formats – including feature films, novels, non-fiction, documentaries, and more – I have a comprehensive background in media development. As a producer, I’ve witnessed first-hand the critical importance of early-stage feedback. Errors corrected at the script level prevent costly reshoots and ensure that the narrative remains consistent across adaptations, such as when a novel is turned into a film.

Investing in the early stages of development not only prevents future setbacks but also enhances the potential saleability of your work, including film rights. My goal is to inspire you to relish the writing and rewriting process, integrating these activities into your creative journey, and helping you produce work that truly stands out.

Empathy Arts Manuscript Services Executive Director: Gregory David Roberts, author of Shantaram.


TESTIMONIALS

“Fay Garrett worked with me on script development for several of my productions. I saw that she had great instincts and very strong storytelling ideas”. I highly recommend her services.
- Steve Barron, Film/TV Director.


"Working with Fay was a transformative experience. Her passion for storytelling brings a deep understanding of the craft to the writer's table. In an industry where structure and audience connection are crucial, Fay's rounded approach is truly groundbreaking.

One aspect of Fay's methodology that truly resonated with me was her emphasis on integrating early-stage feedback. This approach not only enriches the creative process but also underscores Fay's dedication to ensuring that every voice is heard and valued, unlocking the full potential of storytelling.

Fay's collaborative approach fosters an environment where creativity thrives, allowing each project to reach its fullest potential. Witnessing someone so dedicated to both creating exceptional stories and empowering others in the process is truly inspiring."
- Lynda R. Edwards - Author

“It It is with great pleasure that we welcome Fay Garrett to the Empathy Arts team. Fay is a forensic editor whose attention to detail is acute, while maintaining a focus on the Big Picture of a book or screenplay. Fay’s fine talent in developing character arcs within a narrative is always empathetic, humane and without judgment. Her awareness of social and political issues gives her sensitive understanding of unconscious bias in a text, which is invaluable to writers in our intensely politicized age. And perhaps most important of all virtues, Fay is a team player who listens attentively to a client, establishes a productive and creative working relationship, and develops a project collaboratively. As a writer myself, I am delighted to recommend Fay Garret to both first time writers who want help in developing a concept, and also to experienced authors who want that invaluable Last Critical Look at a project before publication”.
- Gregory David Roberts, CEO, Empathy Arts SA.
EMPAHTY ARTS SA        GENEVA, SWITZERLAND
‘Obey your instinct to create and love and learn.’ Idriss, TMS page 314